Broken English
Every weekend, I would anxiously listen for the sounds of the postman arriving in our lobby...
the jingle jangle of the keys, the slamming of the metal mailboxes in our apartment building's lobby as he wrapped up his delivery for the day.
Getting the mail was one of my favorite things to do and something I looked forward to - especially when I knew we were waiting for correspondence from mi Tía Chepa and Tío Carlos in Honduras.
Getting their letters in the mail was a gift.
Their letters, having traveled thousands of miles across the Central and North American continents,
connected me to my culture, my ancestry, my heritage, my roots.
And, their letters motivated me to learn how to read and write in Spanish.
At first, Mami would read me the notes Tía Chepa and Tío Carlos would write to me.
But eventually, I wanted to be able to read them for myself.
I remember sitting down at the kitchen table
leveraging the lessons I was learning in school to read and write in English
determined to learn how to read and write in Spanish.
Slowly but surely, Mami guided me and eventually I got there.
When I started Kindergarten, I was placed in a bilingual class for children whose first language was Spanish and who were learning English as a second language. (ESL)
After a few weeks, my teacher realized I knew more English than they had anticipated and moved me to a "regular-ed" monolingual English class.
They told Mami this would be best.
The sooner I could get into an all English classroom, the better off I'd be.
And, while this was technically true (given the jacked-up school system I had access to), this reality is not reflective of the type education that our children are worthy of and are entitled to -
An education that centers, honors, values and affirms their culture, identity and lived experiences (and this most definitely includes their native language).
~
Being bilingual
knowing both English and Spanish
has proven to be a superpower for me in so many ways.
And,
it also came with tons of power, privilege and responsibility.
Knowing English and Spanish meant...
...translating for Mami at parent/teacher meetings and doctor visits,
...interpreting documents that were too advanced for her to understand,
...helping her prepare for her US Citizenship test,
...supporting her to write letters, fill out cards, complete documents in English...
"Mami… cómo se escribe…" she'd often ask me (and still does).
Mami came to this country to work and to provide a better future to my brother and I. While she did go to language school to learn English, she learned just enough to get her by... continuing to develop her language skills formally was a luxury that she could not afford.
A lot of pride came with being able to help Mami in these ways.
And, with time (if I'm being honest),
it has been a challenge and has come at a cost.
It was the beginning of me assuming responsibility for so many things at a young age.
But, more than anything else, it has been a source of self love and pride.
So, many might say Mami's English is "broken" but I say it's perfect. It's what passion sounds like. It's what being resilient, determined and a warrior sounds like.
And, I am eternally humbled and grateful to be a part of the beautiful mosaic that's been created from those "broken" pieces.
Tía chepa and tío Carlos have passed away and are now ancestors. (Que descansen en paz).
I never got to truly thank them for this beautiful gift they gave me without perhaps realizing it.
The gift of navigating three worlds; English, Spanish and the in-between.
The gift of connection to Whom and Where I come from
Our beauty, history, resilience, brilliance, and magic.
I am because they are.
Bárbara Escudero, ACC, CPC, ELI-MP
Certified Professional Coach and Education Consultant
Bárbara Escudero, LLC
My vision and mission is dedicated to realizing a world where historically and systemically marginalized Black, Indigenous, Latinx, People of Color are fully experiencing and living in our infinite potential.
PS: Does any of this resonate? I'd love to know! Feel free to hit reply and share!
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